The Tohru Show
by Berrie Salamander
Summary: Various sketches, mostly based around everyone's favourite tent-dwelling orphan, Tohru Honda! At least I think she's everyone's favourite...
1. Chapter 1

**This was originally a comic I made, but since I can't draw, I decided to adapt it to writing form! :) I hope it works. Its basically a series of random sketches, mostly based around Tohru. So, welcome to: The Tohru Show!**

The Tohru Show

Tohru: I think my fringe needs cutting…

Momiji: No joke…

Tohru: What did you say?

Momiji: Wah, Tohru's gone scaaary…

…..

Tohru: Yuki! Kyo! Shigure! I'm home!

_**Silence**_

Where is everybody?

_**Walks into the living room, and freezes.**_

Ah. They're all…dead…

…

Thanks for getting rid of them for me, Hana-chan! At last, the house is mine!

_**Hana appears from the shadows**_

Hana: You're welcome, Tohru. Now who's next on the list?

_**Tohru shows her a piece of paper that says: 'Momiji'**_

…..

Hiro: Umm, Tohru, I have something to tell you…

Tohru: Yes, Hiro?

Hiro: I think I'm in love with you!

…

Tohru: I'll be back in a second, okay, Hiro?

_**In a different room**_

Lets cross Hiro off the 'people who hate me list'…(there are ten people on this list)

And add him to the 'people who love me' list (there are about thirty people on this list)

There! All better!

…..

Motoko: Tohru Honda…

Tohru: M-Motoko Minagawa… senpai…

Motoko: Thanks for giving me Yuki's address!

Tohru: You're welcome!

_**Yuki Sohma,**_

_**House in the Middle of Some Woods,**_

_**Japan**_

Motoko: Let the stalking begin!

…..

_(This one is sort of a crossover with Shugo Chara)_

Tohru: What the-? An egg?

**Poof**

Onigiri: Hello Tohru! I'm the person you want to be! I'm Onigiri, and I'm –

Tohru: Dinner!

…..

Tohru: It's so refreshing to have a bath!

Yuki: Honda-san!

Tohru: Yuki-kun…

Shigure! Yuki-kun's being a pervert!

Yuki: Am not!

Tohru: I'm demoting you back to Sohma-kun!

La la la la…

**Well…that was…pretty random. Be warned: there will be more of this in the future! :D Until then, sayonara! Or whatever the Japanese say to say goodbye…**


	2. Chapter 2

Kyo: Um, Tohru, what are you doing?

Tohru: Drawing!

Kyo: Wow, you're a bad drawer. What's this one supposed to be?

Tohru: Oh, nothing…

Kyo: Is that me and Yuki –

…

Tohru: Hehe…

…..

_**To Tohru-kun,**_

_**HAPPY BIRTHDAY!**_

_**From,**_

_**Shigure**_

Tohru: I wonder what it could be?

Later on

Tohru: Shigure…

Shigure: Yes?

Tohru: Thanks for the outfit! (_Tohru is wearing another of those maid outfits)_

Kyo + Yuki: GO TO HELL SHIGURE!

Shigure: Where on earth did they get those guns? Uh, Tohru, help, please…

…

TRASH HEAVEN

Yuki: Honda-san, why is this place so messy?

Tohru: Oh my God! I mean, I'm sick! I've been ill for the past two weeks! You and Kyo and

Shigure could've done something! You never do anything!

Kyo: Hey Tohru, what's for dinner?

Tohru: …

Yuki: Oh boy. Brace yourself Kyo – I think you may have just pushed her over the edge…

…..

Tohru: I'm back from work! But Yuki-kun wasn't there to pick me up…Kyo-kun, have you seen

Yuki?

Kyo: No…

Twitchy flower

Hana: _He's lying…_

Tohru: Hana-chan?

Kyo: Not the psychic!

Hana: He murdered Yuki!

Tohru: Wait, how did Hana-chan get in?

Hana: His body is behind that sofa!

Tohru: Oh no! Yuki-kun! Kyo-kun, I'll never forgive you.

Kyo: (_To Hana) _You're next.

…

_**Tohru is standing beside a window, an intense look on her face.**_

Hatori: Okay Kyo, lets hear you're heartbeat.

Kyo: Yes Hatori.

Kyo is now shirtless!

Tohru: Wow! Uh – ah!

**CRASH.**

Tohru: Ouch, that hurt…but it was worth it!

**That's all for now from the Tohru Show, but don't worry, the next chapter will probably be up tomorrow! See you soon!**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3 of The Tohru Show is here! More randomness, all of which came from my head during the summer holidays. Ah, summer, I miss you…

Tohru: Would you like some tea, Kisa?

Kisa: Sure.

Kisa drinks the tea

Kisa: Thanks, Tohru! That – was –

_**Thud**_

Narrator: And so, Kisa Sohma was poisoned at the hands of her beloved Tohru Honda.

Tohru: Who the hell are you?

Narrator: Not a clue!

…..

Tohru: I'm so excited that Ritchan is coming to stay!

**Ding-dong!**

Tohru: That must be him!

Ritsu: Hello Tohru-kun!

(_Ritsu has had a haircut, and is no longer wearing female clothes)_

Tohru: Who the hell are you?

Ritsu: Tohru-kun, it's me, Ritsu Sohma. I've only had a haircut…

Tohru: It's a weird stalker/murderer! I better call the police!

Ritsu: Not the police! Please, Tohru, noooooo! My haircut was a bad idea, I'm sorry that you

think I'm a stalker/murderer, I'm sorry!

…

Tohru: Hatsuharu-kun, can I ask you a favour?

Haru: Sure thing. Does it involve Yuki?

Tohru: Well, I was wondering if you could become Black Haru again? Its just that you

haven't in a while, and I sort of miss it…

Haru: I'd love to Tohru, but you have to do something first, to make me turn black.

Tohru: Umm… I saw Yuki kissing Rin!

…

Haru: I have got to see this!

Tohru: But, no, wait, Hatsuharu-kun, come back!

…..

Tohru: Shigure. It's terrible!

Shigure: What's wrong?

Tohru: Yuki's gone _Ayame!_

Yuki: Mwa ha ha ha!

That's it, my beautiful subjects, grow for your king!

Tohru: Yuki-kun, calm down, they're only strawberries!

…

Yuki: So embarrassed…

…..

Momiji: This lollipop is delicious!

Tohru: Momiji, isn't that you're fifth lollipop this morning?

Momiji: Yeah, but they taste even better than normal! Look!

Special pack of Lollipops!

Tohru: Momiji! These lollipops have drugs in them!

Momiji: WHAT! Oh Lord, Buddha, Santa, please forgive me!

Tohru: You still believe in Santa?

Momiji: Yes.

**And there you have it. Hope you enjoyed it! I think I have one more chapter to upload…**


	4. Chapter 4

This is the final chapter of the Tohru Show. Because I only wrote four 'episodes' originally, and I have no new ideas (my lack of imagination, thats the problem)

Rin: Tohru, I've come to warn you!

Tohru: About what, Rin?

Rin: Kagura. She thinks you love Kyo, so she's on her way to kill you!

Tohru: We'll see about that!

Rin: That's right, Tohru, and by the end of the day I will have one less problem to deal

with.

…..

Teacher: Tohru! How many times have I told you, not to sleep in class. Now will you please –

Tohru: No ! I won't! I won't go! You can't make me! I'm tired of your oppressive ways! I'm

being transferred!

…

Yuki: That's the third time this week…

Kyo: That's what comes from eating too many leeks…

…..

Tohru: Everyday I have to clean this house…I know! Its time to let my creative juices flow!

Some time later

Yuki: Tohru! Kyo and I are home! Wait…my school tie! Its on a picture frame!

Kyo: So is my favourite t-shirt!

TOHRU!

Tohru: Yes?

Kyo: We want our stuff back!

Tohru: Alright, but I was just trying to make my life a little more exciting. At least everyone

should be happy now…

MY KIMONO!

…

Tohru: I forgot about Shigure!

…..

Tohru: First, you take the doll…then, take a needle…

Hana: That's right, Tohru. Very good. This one's for Kisa, right?

Tohru: Yes. Then, you stick the needle in the doll –

Hana: No, Tohru. You have to put thread in a needle before you start sewing!

Tohru: Oh yeah! I forgot.

An amount of time later…

Tohru: Here you go, Kisa, I made a doll for you!

Kisa: Oh, thankyou Tohru!

Tohru: That's alright, Kisa!

And there you have it. The end of the Tohru Show. To end, here are the sketches that I decided not to include:

**Tohru cleans out her bedroom**

**Tohru tries to create a new look for herself**

**Tohru cracks under the pressure of a test**

**Tohru goes to Hana's house**

**And then, I may add an Easter, a Haloween and a Christmas special of the Tohru Show. They are all just one long story, not various little ones.**


End file.
